Enough with the corporate b#llsh!t. Am I out of the job?! Can someone please decode this biz-PC press release, and tell me the fate of my future at TV Guide Network.
Video software maker Macrovision (MVSN.O) said on Friday that it would acquire television programming guide company Gemstar-TV Guide (GMST.O) in a cash-and-stock deal worth about $2.8 billion. Gemstar-TV Guide shareholders will be able to sell each of their shares for $6.35 in cash or convert it for 0.2548 of a common share in a new holding company that will own both Gemstar-TV Guide and Macrovision. A restructuring of the TV Guide brand and its subsidiaries is scheduled for April of 2008.
On second thought, I'll be making as much on unemployment as I do now. Plus, I'll have my entire day free to drink at the Abbey, watch People's Court and catch up on my porn. Maybe my impending layoff is a homo-blessing in designer threads disguise....
WeLCuM 2...
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